5 Reasons Why Being a Unicorn Would Suck

Last week I presented to you all 5 Reasons Why Being a Unicorn Would Be Awesome; my homage to how much better my life would be if I were magically transformed into a unicorn.

But being a unicorn wouldn't be all sunshine and rainbows.

So, I present to you...

5 Reasons Why Being a Unicorn Would Suck

1. It would be really hard to hold things with your hooves

Trying to read a book would nearly impossible.




2. Your horn wouldn't hold things very easily, either

Like cereal boxes. Cereal boxes would be hard to pick up with your horn.



3. People would probably stare at you on the bus



4. Having a horn is basically like having a giant sword on your face



Cops would probably require you to get a 'dangerous weapon' permit just to walk around.

And even that wouldn't protect you from accidentally stabbing people - imagine you're zoning off, daydreaming about how awesome being a mythical beast is, and suddenly you hear a noise.
Startled, you quickly turn to look over your shoulder.
Congratulations - you just accidentally stabbed the guy behind you.



5. Since unicorns aren't real, there's a large chance you don't even exist

And that's an existential view my fragile ego wouldn't be able to handle....