Snow in Seattle

As most of you are far too aware, it snowed in Seattle this morning.

Now, some of you may remember my post explaining the phenomenon of Rain Induced Amnesia. Seattle drivers, though well experienced at driving in the rain, absolutely suck at it.

Snow has the same effect. Just one thousand fold.

Snow has the added bonus of not only making everyone in Seattle completely forget everything about driving, but also being horrifically dangerous even if you do know what you're doing.

Which, for the record, I don't.

This morning was the first time I ever drove in the snow.

And this afternoon was the first time I ever hit ice, lost control of my car, and attempted to hit a building.

Let's start at the beginning.

At ten to four my boss came up to tell me the snow outside was getting to be "Pretty serious".







So I went to our office's one window, and took a look for myself.
















Since it was only my second time driving on snow, I was a little nervous.
But, I promised myself I'd take it slow, take it easy, and I'd be fine.

I slowly drove out of my parking garage onto the road, and got into the turn lane.




Now, here's what a meant to do:



All I wanted was to take a nice, wide left turn.

Here's what I actually did.




Halfway into my turn I hit ice that turned my car into a two thousand pound sled.

I knew something was wrong when I started to move sideways.





You see, my car doesn't have a sideways function.


Thankfully, I spent all day reading up on what to do if you lose control on the ice.


Let me explain; if there's the slightest chance something could happen, once I'm introduced into the equation the probability of it happening becomes one.

So I figured I better be prepared.

Now, all of the articles I read unanimously agreed that you should just let the car slide, and not try to slam on your breaks or turn.

So, I let the car ride.















Finally, with a very mild 'thump' my car came to rest against the curb.



At which point I carefully reversed, straightened the M&M, and drove home.

So, though snow is magical.
And though Seattle (even today) gets very, very little compared to other areas.
And though I made it back safe.
And though the M&M was fine.
I can enthusiastically say:

FUCK SNOW